21+12

Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to mmmmm me, Happy Birthday to me.
People always ask, "do you feel older?" and all my life I would answer "nope" the same.  Well the events of the last two years have taken it's toll and yup feel older! But I'm assuming that means wiser too. (Or maybe wise to the fact that I don't know much and realize this as time goes on). 

A much needed night out was had last night at a local pub in the city.  Alex was in his usual good (not so good) form after I put him to bed so Marcus and I decided to wait outside for our ride because my eye actually started to twitch listening to his nightly bed time rants.  Thank goodness for my mama stepping in and saving the day for me.  (moms should get gifts on their kids bdays as well).

I realized something while driving into the city, after chatting with Marcus and Adrian about "what they did for their past bday" and it was, to put it bluntly...boring and uneventful.  How terrible is that? Since when did we loose the need to make a fuss for just one day out of the year! Let's face it, life is dull, uneventful, hard and repeats itself daily for the most part - so we need to MAKE A FUSS PEOPLE.

Make a fuss, go all out, be silly, forget about real life...just for one day.

I had to learn this for next year - hence the eye twitch.

Look out 34!

P.S Thank the lord I didn't indulge the shots Adrian bought me. That would have hurt this morning. HURT!

Random personal thought

I'm not going to reveal to the world where I first heard this song becasue it's sameful. (ok, reality TV but I'm not going to say more).

Anyway, it's my new favorite song of the week. It takes me back to a very fond time with Marcus. Butterflies, first dates - I wish you could bottle that feeling and spary it around the house when things get heavy. It's funny how even though it does take me back when I listen to the lyrics of the song, the boys are weaved into my thoughts as well.

"This is the start of something good, don't you agree".

Enjoy!

"Follow through"

First date - 2003

and....they're off!

I need you to play the "William Tell Overture" as I describe the events of the morning...

Background:
We thought it would be great to sign Hayden up for swimming lessons so after reciving the "how to's" from a good friend we were all set.
"How to's"  you ask? - Yes "how to's" apparantly just picking up the phone on any given day to sign up for swimming lessons is not an option.

FIRST you have to get a FAMILY #
THEN you have to get a CLIENT # FOR EVERY MEMBER OF THE FAMILY
and then....let the races begin.

Phone lines and on line register opened up this morning at 7:00am. I was told by a source to get the on-line and phone line reg going at the same time to "ensure you get through".  You have GOT to be joking me...

So this morning at  6:58 I sat in front of my computer with phone in hand and hand on the mouse ready to get through. (insert music here).......
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 GUN SHOT
on
redial
busy signal
hang up
refresh screen
on
redial
busy signal
hang up
refresh screen.

I could just picture the other 100000000000000 mothers FRANTICALY trying to get through because the thought of entire spring and summer going by with nothing planned every Sat morning was NOT an option.

Annnnnnn they're off. Short legs hayden riding mama biafore rounds the first corner, but wait, neighbour down the street being road by red haired kid just takes the lead on the second pass, creepy guy in the fedora being road by cute little girl falls back and short legs hayden takes the lead.

30 min of the preverbial horse race and I got through....

30 MIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMAO

Out of spite I couldn't give up, so I didn't.

The things we do.....

P.S Side comment, I caught the boys flu last night and even after a night of hugging the toilet bowl I still had the strength to do this at 7:00am.  Again, the things we do....

Diarrhea, constipation and puke...oh my!

Ready? Sing with me....

Follow the yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road
follow, follow, follow, follow,  follow the yellow brick road....

If ever oh ever a poop there was the poopers of mine are ones because.

because. because, because because becauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse

cause all of the wonderful poops there was.

We're off to deal with the poopers, the wonderful poopers of oz.

Hayden - Diarrhea running down his leg on to his foot. bight yellow - like the yellow brick road.
Alex - So contipated his head is about to pop off and he keeps throwing up because he's so full and backed up.


But right now... they both sleep.

This one's for Hayden

Hayden just made me dance with him to "say hey I love you" about ten times just now.
(It's 9:15am).

A feel good song, worth a listen. H, this one's for you!!!

Poke my eyes out

So I caved and hired a sleep consultant because getting up 6-8 times a night with a six month old is just ridiculous. So she has me fill out a questionaire and we have a phone call this weekend. Should be interesting.... In the mean time I type as Alex whines over the monitor for the third time since I put him down at 6:30 (it's 8:08). He's been crying for 8 min and I thought typing away would get my mind off of the fact that he's awake yet again and not a happy camper.  Five more min of this b.s and I'll cave.

Poke my eyes out.

8:09 - 3 seconds of silence.

8:10 - still going strong. (I wonder if Hayden is waking up ticked)

I gave him tylonal before bed bc I thought his teeth may be bugging him AND he's so full he spit up.

8:11- still going. This is not a distraction

I'm a bad mother

8:12- I know if I give him a bottle he'll just fall back asleep... maybe I should, not feeling very strong.

8:13 - This min by min blow by blow is tourture

Now he's not only crying but hes fake coughing. Did i mention I broke my video monitor so I have no idea if hes upsite down, right side up...god maybe I should go in.

8:14 - quiet, quiet, quiet, quiet....quiet!! quiet! quiet! quiet!  oh my god! QUIET! no sounds... a little moan...

8:15 - still nothing! moan... nothing nothing nothing nothing....whine....nothing.....

distracted by survivor...

8:15 - and....he cries again... nothing... nothing... nothing....

8:16- whine... nothing nothing

(breathing)

8:17 - I hear nothing! Is he back asleep?

crap... did i need a sleep therapist? LOL

8:19 and a full two min of silence. (for now)

maybe I AM the baby whisperer.

8:35 stir and whine

god i wish i had chocolate. Chocolate chips, man I would even settle for bakers chocolate. Why the heck don't Marcus and I EVER buy junk food? CLEARLY I need it.

8:37 silence

9:41 yelling

ok 10 min and then I'll go check him.

9:44 still yelling (clearly I have officially lost my mind documenting a blow by blow of my evening) - EVERY evening for the last six months by the way, did I mention that?

9:46- distracted from funny epi of the office - still yelling

9:48 - tappering, tappering.... (LOL I HAVE lost it - but this is actually helping).

Jolly old jumper

So flipping cute

First time in the jolly jumper....

Goals

Do you ever find if you don't set goals for yourself or make plans you just coast along from day to to day without any real direction? I know, an obvious conclusion but so easy it is to fall into the throws of day to day life.
Anyway, I have been wanting to get back into running since the day before I found out I was prego with Hayden.  I was participating in the Run for the Cure, an easy 5k fun run for charity.  About half way through the run I felt more winded than usual and wanting to walk the rest of the way. "Hey Mama" by the "Black Eyed Peas" was playing on my ipod and I wondered as I listened to the chorus - could I be pregant? Naaaa..

Well, I'm not pregnant anymore after two years of being pregnant so back into running I go! I set a goal to get ready again for the Sporting life 10k in May.  This run is for Sick Kids and a fun event to participate in.

So there is my goal, killing a few birds with one stone.  Back into shape(ish), donate some time to charity, and a goal to work towards.

Now...if Alex would only SLEEP AT NIGHT, the transition from couch to running shoes would be easier.

Let the training begin!

Things I want to remember

Because this whole part of infancy is a blur...really, where did the last 5.5 months go?

Alex:
Old soul... he really is. I say this because I sware he looks at me and just understands everything I say. When he smiles I feel it. You know what I mean? You know when you feel a smile?

Happy - all the time. Such a wonderful little temperment.
Sleeps like an angel.... NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Laughs easy
Likes the soother at nap time
sleeps on his tummy
likes strangers (or anyone that will look at him)

Hayden:
"Spirited" (no need to get into anything else about that!)
Loves to sleep
Was a good eater but is now picky
Talks all the time.
Loves his books
Loves Dora
Loves Elmo
Loves cars
Loves Daddy
Likes to take Alex's socks off
FUNNY, knows it and tries to be
Loves Lui
Says up for down and down for up
drives me nuts
melts my heart

I'm really enjoying my time with my boys in spite of the hard parts. 
I love you guys xo.

HAPPY anniversary

A year ago this past Monday, my sister had her liver transplant. A hard year of adjustment for her but like the tropper she is, she does it with a smile on her face always looking for that silver lining.  Her ordeal makes me realize that there are "extra pregnancy weight and sleepless nights" problems and then there are REAL problems.  Makes my whole rants on my blog so trivial (not that it's going to stop me though :)  ).

Anyway, I just wanted to mention her today because she deserves the recognition for being the best sport I have ever met and a hero I'm sure to many. xxx

Perfectly Lonely

On V-day Marcus and I were happy to run away for a few hours and attended the John Mayer concert at the A.C.C.  Great show, great seats, great time! 

Anyway getting reved up for the concert and since I've been enjoying his latest album and indirectly so has Hayden! When I play "Perfectly Lonley" he claps and dances with a huge smile on his face. Its delishly adorable! (Yes, he has his moments between his "spirited" out bursts")

At the concert I was asked for ID when ordering a drink.  I almost kissed the bar tender! "I have two kids" I said with a big smile on my face, when at that moment I realized... I have two kids. - Marcus and I have two kids! A night out just the two of us acting silly and how quickly we forget! It was fun to forget and worry about nothing more than my sore feet from dancing. Sometimes, sore feet from dancing needs to be my biggest concern, if only for a little while.  :)

Pasta Face won't hug his mama!

Already...he's too cool for hugs unless HE wants them.
The only way I got any attention from him yesterday was if I wore this funny hat and basically stood on my head!
Ps. Alex can now hold his own bottle....yeah!

I take it back

Time out's work.

Caught in the act

Every night around dinner time the little rascals and I get our groove on.  I know..how cheezy. I'm pretty sure I even do the mom dance.. in fact I'm positive as I caught a glimps of myself in the kitchen window doing the white girl over bite. I could have sworn I once had rhythm though.  It must have joined the suit case with flat tummy, high heals and a rested attitude.

Anyway... white girl over bite aside I was having a good time.  Dancing, laughing, clapping, swinging, and spinning.  Hayden thought I was a great dancer.....and so did my passing neighbour on the street.

I'm going to town feeling the music in my front sitting room when I look up and see my neighbour standing on the street bouncing her head in approval of my family bonding boogie. 

At first I wanted to hit the deck and hide under the couch but I thought heck... if she's ballsy enough to not only admit that she's watching us but enjoying herself, then I'm going to own my white girl over bite of a moment with my kids.

Shame is for dummies and so 2009.

Healthy cooking...why bother?

Why do I bother cooking a healthy salmon and salad dinner tonight when I chase it five minutes later with a shot of tequilla and a rolo ice cream cone. (did I REALLY just admit that?)

I know.. shameful. (and yes I do realize it's Monday and really, who does shots of tequilla unless it's spring break in Mexico).

I think I just need the comfort! In fact, I know I need the comfort after such a hard month with the kids.

The other day I called a public health nurse and said that I would like to "cash in" on my visit with a nurse now, seeing I never took advantage of the service when either of the boys were born.  All the nurse said to me was "are you ok? is everything ok?" as I watched Hayden pant, and I broke down and cried.  I sobbed like a baby for a good five minutes while this angel of a voice comforted me on the other end.  I explained to her my worry about the boys, their illnesses, the trips to the hospital the lack of sleep etc all a while knowing that this is the reality of motherhood and feeling like a real baby, jerk, wimp, failure etc.

She gave me a little lecture about the importance of taking care of myself first and doing whatever I can to catch up on my sleep, take my vitamins and eat healthy (hence my attempt above).

Can I just say how i love that stranger on the other end? LOVE HER! I want her to come by and see me every week. If I make it interesting enough maybe she'll just want to pop by on her own?!!  She can examine the boys, listen to my sob stories and tell me how everything is fine.  I'll rent us movies, plan day trips, oh how I want her to be my new bff.

So tonight I took her advice and took care of myself (with chocolate and alcohol).

baby steps.

Dare to Compare and some cute shots

Hayden 8 months and Alex 5 months playing in the exisaucer.

Hayden exhausted after a night of listening to Alex. He dares to lie where the poopie bums go.

Discipline or hypocrit?

With the recent ( and seems to be on- going) colds Hayden has been fighting,  he certainly has his moments of irritation. As much as I do get it, I also won't tolerate "brat like" behaviour such as hitting mommy when he doesn't get his way.

I have yet to try the "time out's" as I just can't see that reason will work on a 19 month old, so what do I do? Hayden hits me, I hit him back...harder.

Before you all gasp over this post please know that I mean a slap on the hand.

But my question does remain...Is an eye for an eye the correct form of punishment?  Am I teaching Hayden "You can't hit, but mommy can?".

Needless to say, it does work.

We do spend a great deal of our youth confused so maybe, just possibly this is a right of passage.

We confuse our kids to help them figure it out.

A new day...

Ok,
First I drove on the spare tire in the snow to the Dr. first thing this morning because as I expected yesterday, Hayden started to wheeze in the night. Now Hayden has brochitis and Alex not only has that but also has an ear infection now.  So some puffers, wrestling with inhalers and a meds later they both seem like they are feeling a little better.  Hayden is still quite wheezy so I'll just keep a close eye on him.

So drop both kids off for a nap (With Claire still helping me) I go off to fix the tire.  When Canadian tire told me yesterday that they didn't have my tire I actually was THAT person and said "Aren't you Canadian TIRE? Is that not the essence of their name? - anyway... that is a whole other rant you already read.

So Honda keeps my car and gives me a free rental because they too now know my sob story and the tears they got on the phone the night before sure helped! lol

I think that is it for the latest and greatest. Now I'm off to down some wine!

Who cries at Canadian Tire?

So there I am standing in Canadian Tire CRYING with five big ginos standing around me in the Auto department conforting me.

But first let us rewind to Sunday morning.

Sunday morning up and recovered from the 24hr flu and on the way to the walk in clinic with Alex.  The Dr. told me that his lungs were clear and to just keep an eye on him.

That evening I wasn't at all comfortable with the way he was breathing so the next day I went straight to Sick Kids Emergency.  Within my first hr there I noticed he started going down hill fast (wanting to sleep, not very responsive, developing fever etc.  So again, I bring it to the nurses attention who basically just don't want to hear it because there are 500 kids throwing up left right and centre.

So once again, I have to rage out on the emerg staff before they realize that I'm right and bump poor Alex to the top of the priority list.

24hs later afer a few fits, meds, oxygen and steroids Alex is showing signs of improvement and was digonosed with bronchitis.  I learned that 80% of kids will have some form of bronchitis before their second birthday and that most likely the virus that caused Haydens pneumonia, caused this (surprise surprise).

So they send me home.  Keep in mind now that I haven't slept since Thursday and was so tired at this point I was seeing things and stumbling around like I had a few (but without the party).

Anyway, get home hug Hayden and within moments notice that his cough which seemed harmless 24hrs prior is now making him gag.  Alight, I thought.... I'm not comfortable with how both kids are acting so first thing in the morning I will take them both now to get checked over so I can sleep at night. (Sorry, so I can hope to sleep at night).

That's when we discover we have a flat tire and the snow begins to fall.  Marcus is up to his eye balls in work and with Frank can Claire helping us out (THANK GOD) I was able to hop in the car and run it up to the Canadian Tire.

So tonight.. I'm at Canadian Tire explaining to them the urgency in getting this tire fixed when they tell me they don't have the tire I need in stock, nor does any location. Ok.... so I call around and NOBODY including the Honda dealership can help me, everyone is out.  So Joanna looks the mechanic in the eye and starts to cry.  Ohhhh that's right. I'm sure the customers standing behind me LOVED it!

So as I was saying... five big guys come from the back and all decide they are going to try and help me come up with a plan. Hilarious!

So home on my donut, I'll drop it off tomorrow after I have the kids checked out...again.

Both kids now asleep,  I'm feeling a little better about Alex...Hayden is another story but we'll take care of him tomorrow.

Tomorrow is a new day.

Good night Irene.