"Kids teach you stuff"

It has been a hard week.
When I say hard I mean, I've been weepy, bitchy, snappy, irritable, short, quiet, angry and frustrated.  Hayden has been two for a week and yes, the "terrible twos" and all the fun stuff that goes with it are officially here.

Aside from hitting when he doesn't get what he wants he has decided to act like a baby (aka Alex) to ask for what he wants. So Alex whines, Hayden whines. Alex gets carried up the stairs, Hayden wants to be carried up the stairs. Alex throws his food, Hayden throws his food.

I realize all this behaviour is normal, will pass and if you stay on top of it will pass quickly but I still have to shamelessly admit that it's getting to me.

After a talk about discipline with my mom she did remind me that "Kids teach you stuff". They teach
you stuff about them and yourself. My son has taught me that through all of this I should listen to my gut
and do what feels right. He has taught me that I need to not take him personally and to (at least try) discipline without emotion. Ha! Sounds easier than it is.  This child needs to know that I gave birth to him, live and breath him and think about nothing else but him! He needs to cut me some slack! Can you explain that to a two year old?  From what I'm learning and the more I'm observing in general, I don't think you can explain that to any child who has yet to become a parent. I definitely didn't understand any of this until recently.
If it wasn't for him being such a good boy outside of his moments of the "terribles" I think I would have lost my mind a long time ago.  Maybe that's why mother nature made babies and kids so darn cute.

Something else I'm learning. I've learned that I care way too much about what other people think.
 I can't help but feel ostracized in public when I'm getting slapped in the face 10000 times. I'm not sure why I care but I feel like I need to explain to the observing world that I am in fact on top of it, that I'm not one of those parents that just sit back and let their kids rule them and that my son is really a wonderful little boy. I know, who cares... but one of those things that fall into the category of "easier said than done".


I've also learned that I have turned into that neighbour that yells all the time, the one I used to imitate as a kid as I peered through the fence fully entertained. (Said in an annoying squawky voice) "Jessica, come inside, Jessica don't hit your sister, Jessica mommy said no!  I have turned into Jessica's mom. I..am...Jessica's mom.  I do not want to be Jessica's mom. I don't want to have to look around to see if there are any windows open before the anticipated drama unfolds. I don't want kids peering through the fence at me. I'm too young to be Jessica's mom. God I feel for Jessica's mom. But funny, Jessica's mom never did seem to care how loud she had to yell to get her point across. I can't help but admire her "flipping the world the bird attitude" as she did what needed to get done.

So I have decided to continue trusting my gut, stop caring what others think and to keep my eye on the prize and already I feel better. So yes "Kids teach you stuff" and apparently mothers (mine and Jessica's) do too.